First published in Onya Magazine on February the 12th, 2010.
Last week I wrote on the intensity of planning weddings. And I don’t take back any of it; it is intense. But what I failed to write, and only briefly mentioned, was that when it comes planning weddings there’s a whole lot of joy and fun to be had.
You can learn a lot in a week. And the past week has taught me that no bride will ever succeed in planning a wedding she’s pleased with if she’s not organised. So, it may have taken me a week, but I did it. I got organised. I sorted through my Post-it notes. I took control of my diary. I replied to the 100 emails in my inbox that required a response, and I opened and addressed the 114 that were sitting there, glaring at me. I’m happy to report that I’ve managed to remain on top of my inbox, and I’m determined to never let it spiral out of control again.
It’s amazing how much better you can feel, and how much smoother the track of life is, when you’re in control and organised. The thing with wedding planning is that it canbe all consuming. I’ve done a mighty fine job of ensuring I’ve never, at any stage, been all consumed by my impending wedding. I’m just not that kind of girl. But there does come a time, usually in the months approaching the wedding, when the heat is turned up and you’re required to start spending a lot more of your time planning stuff. And heading to appointments. And picking things up. And thinking of things. And I suppose, in all honesty, I just wasn’t prepared to deal with that, on top of everything else. I’ve always been so all consumed by my career, or calendar, or my not-for-profit organisation, that giving too much brain time to a wedding seemed almost selfish.
When you work with people that are ‘disadvantaged’, or help people who have very little, or share wisdom with teenagers that have surreal life stories, you can have a very realistic view of the world. And sometimes that realism doesn’t involve the magic of weddings. What I’ve learnt, over the past week, is that just because someone else’s life is in ruins, does not mean you have to send yours in the same direction too. I don’t have to apologise for planning an amazing day, just because someone else in the world is less fortunate than I am, and is unable to do the same thing too. And more than anything I’ve realised that when you work hard, you deserve to get everything you can ever possibly want.
I want to have an amazing wedding day. And I’m going to. And in order to do so I’m reminded of the key to it all; being organised. I always have been, but as I said last week, renovating, wedding planning and operating a business is more full on that I ever could have expected. But I’m kicking its arse with organisation.
It’s quite the paradox; if you don’t want to be stressed, you need to get organised. But in order to be organised, you need to deal with a little stress, and some rushing around. However, if you push through, you’ll be left with a diary full of dates you can meet, a to-do list you can cope with, and some extra time to sit back, maybe with a cuppa, or even with a hair mask on in the bath, and think about just how lucky you are. And why you deserve to be so. Guilt free.
*Weddings, Parties, Anything were an Australian indie folk rock band formed in 1984 in Melbourne, that continued rocking until 1998. Their name came from The Clash song Revolution Rock. I’ve decided to use it as the name for this weekly column because I was born in Melbourne in 1984 and love Australian indie folk rock. And I’m having a Wedding, Party, Anything in 2010.
SANDI SIEGER. 